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Washington, United States
loves: you win if you guessed "pets" and "museums". Also books, art history, travel, British punk, Korean kimchi, bindis, martinis, and other things TBD. I will always make it very clear if a post is sponsored in any way. Drop me a line at thepetmuseum AT gmail.com !

Tuesday, April 08, 2014

a great dane fan versifies

I have to say this is another to add to my mental file named Bad pet poetry would be the easiest book to put together ever.  Here's Harry Leslie St. Clair, whose book Memory's Ship and Other Poems (vanity published in Gresham, OR in 1922) includes such gems as "Ode to A Spoon" and "What's Wrong?" It also delights us with this glorification of the Great Dane:

There are dogs and dogs, so great a pack
Some wish they'd go and not come back.
The little curs infest the town
And turn the country upside down.
Give me the Dane, who'll work or play
With man or child the livelong day.
He's large and strong and firm as steel
When danger lurks or foes conceal.

The pug is good for naught, I ween
Caress the thing? I wouldn't be seen.
The poodle's just a clown, you know.
No use on earth except for show.
But when Great Dane steps out before
The world's high ginks galore
You know a prince walks down the aisle
And holds his rank with grace the while.

The terrier's a boistrous chap.
He thinks it's fun to yap and yap.
Will dig all night to catch a rat.
Some folks prefer to own a cat.
Not much for noise is my Prince Dane.
He never looks or acts insane.
But when he undertakes to speak
You 'll know his voice is far from weak.

Some dogs there are can't see for hair.
Grotesque, absurd beyond compare.
Can't tell which end is front or rear.
Think they'd inspire a thief with fear?
But Prince is of a royal line.
His eye, his brain can near divine
The thoughts you think, the way you feel.
The Dane will make a strong appeal.

Each dog will celebrate his day,
But few will go to heaven, I pray.
The Shepherd, St. Bernard and Dane
Are dogs you'll want to meet again.
Then give the Dane to me, I say.
The child, the home, the man, all day
And night, are safe from man or beast
While he's on guard—and lives—at least.

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